Over the past couple of months my BFF and I have been growing even more and more close. We talk daily and have shared more things with each other than I ever thought possible with a friend. As I said in my post all about her…she’s amazing and I love her.

Despite my love for her, I felt a moment of panic today. That panic that my walls are coming down and she’s peeling back my layers… that she’s going to see me for the mess that I see… and what happens when she decides that she can’t handle my level of crazy or my lifestyle or my family.

I’ve seen it happen before with other best friends that I’ve had in my life. The “forever” part of BFFs never seems to last forever.

I can feel the vulnerability standing there looking at the castle walls that I’ve built up.

I crave that closeness with a friend. But I’m scared of it…but I’m even more terrified that it will end…that a friendship will end.